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Q:
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mom wont let me get a boa any suggestions on how u got ur mom to let u get one
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i want a boa is this a good idea it would be my 2 reptile and if so how could i convince my mom to let me get one cause she is afraid of them and i cant get her to crack any suggestions
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 12:41:49 AM
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NCherper
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What is your first Reptile? My parents had no problems with me keeping lizards when I was younger, but they drew the line at snakes. No amount of arguing or convincing could change that. I had to wait until I had my own place in college. Have you asked to keep other snakes? I would try asking about a corn or a king. If she agrees to that, I would be content in that. She has a right to be afraid of a large constrictor in her own house. So I would soften her up with something smaller and less intimidating first, not to mention it would give you an opportunity to get some snake keeping experience (unless the animal you already have is a snake).
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 1:40:33 AM
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aalomon
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Is there anyone in your area you could pet sit for? My mom would react better to me wanting a pet if we both had experience with it first and that was one way we got it.
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 2:12:07 AM
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critterking1987
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boas are nice snakes but if its going to be your first snake i would start with a ball python or a corn snake you wouldnt want to start with a snake that will grow to to around 10 feet and three feet in the first year and weighing over 50 pounds and they grow fast my first snake was a ball python then i got experanced with that and then i moved to the bigger snakes like boas
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Author Comment
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10/25/2008 9:07:19 AM
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beradienboadude
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well my first reptile is a bearded dragon and she almost got me a ball python at a reptile show so do u think keep on going to reptile shows will make her crack
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 9:40:55 AM
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tmth
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Nothing made my mom 'crack' and I simply waited until midway through my second year of college- out of the dorms and finished with study abroad. Then I got my snakes (and a dog! :P ) I wouldn't push it too much because she is your boss... And a smaller snake might be better than a boa, at first. Irian Jaya Carpet pythons don't get very big, or of course- balls and corns.
Going to reptile shows is a good learning experience for you as well, so if you can get to more, definitely go. And who knows, your mom may even soften and let you get a snake?
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 9:44:02 AM
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Hannebuddika
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I was lucky my parents not only encouraged me to learn all about snakes before hand but they also took me to a breeder to get my first snake. Show your parents first that you are learning about reptile keeping (with a beardie you've got a head start)! and you are very much aware of how to keep a snake safetly. Reassure your mom that it can't escape since that is what most people are afraid of. Not that it's in the house but that it just might show up unexpectedly. Taking your mom with you to the reptile shows was a great idea! Now she gets to learn and be comfortable around snakes before hand. Try to get her to handle one next!!!
I hate to say but a Boa may be too ambitious for your first snake, espcially with your mom being so reluctant. A ball python is an excellent choice for a first snake. By the time your ready for a Boa you'll either be out of your mom's house or she may be more agreeable to you having one.
Lots of Luck to You and be Persistent!!!!
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Accepted Answer
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10/25/2008 2:16:06 PM
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aaron
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For posterity:
I agree with Nate (I know, I''m scared too)... a redtail type boa is probably not the best first choice. Something that can get 8'' and weigh that much isn''t going to win your mom over.. she should be rightly concerned about something like that.
Corns are probably the best bet for you -- tons of variations, and babies are incredibly small ... much less intimidating for your mom.
Remember, whether its your mom, a friend, whatever, some people just have a fear of snakes for whatever reason. In order to get them to come around, they can''t be forced, and it takes time. I have two friends who are petrified of snakes -- both grown men. One of them I was able to finally get to touch an adult chondro (after being over to see the snakes probably 10 times) and hold a baby on his own... he was creeped out, but somewhat intrigued and receptive.
The other guy simply will not come over anymore. His (irrational) fear is simply too great.
Do lots of research on snakes, and don''t pine when she says no the first 30 times. Don''t get angry, that will only increase her reluctance. Be mature about it, understanding, and gradually persistent... if you have a local nature center or zoo, find out what they have and see if you can get her to go.. ditto local breeders... if you can get her to just take a trip to a breeder, they may also be helpful in showing her that they''re not to be feared, are interesting creatures, and maintainable by someone in your position. Once you have that corn, you can work your way up (for both you AND her) into bigger animals.
Best of luck!
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Assisted Answer
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10/25/2008 2:43:31 PM
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FyreFocks
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I definitely need to copy/paste that somewhere Aaron. Heh heh. You agreed with me.
Well, since i already said what i had to in your blog, i can only agree with everything thats been said here. Not only should you educate yourself first, no matter how long it takes, but you should take every opportunity to educate your mom. And since this has been such a hot topic lately, i think its worth mentioning; Check with your state and county to make there arent any laws in place that might prevent you from owning a snake.
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Assisted Answer
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10/25/2008 3:27:27 PM
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Jeffriey
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Wow I think I may have to agree with Nate too...
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 3:32:57 PM
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 5:08:20 PM
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HannahsHerps
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I started begging for a snake the day I learned to talk =x I finally got one when I was 18. My mom seemed to like the ball pythons more than the corns. She wasnt scared so much of the size but the amount of movement it made. The baby ball pythons just balled up and sat in your hands, while the corns were twisting through fingers and such. I'm also on snake #5 since I bought my first one, and my mom actually picked out a pastel ball python to breed with my spider. =)
Anyway, here is how I talked her into it.
1. Frozen food only, she didnt like the idea of live mice or rats.
2. I was NOT to let my grandmother know about it.
3. The cage had to lock, and be inspected by her, because if it got loose ,I would have to get rid of all my animals.
4. I had to buy it, buy everything for it, and pay for its food and such.
5. I had to handle it, if it became agressive she didnt want it in the house.
Also, if she has had a few glasses of wine that helps too. =)
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 5:58:28 PM
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jbt123
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There are boas that you can get that will not grow over 3 feet in length. Rosy boas and Kenyan Sand boas are VERY good beginner snakes. They are also adorable! My grandmother, who is not a big fan of snakes, actually called them "cute", which was amazing to me.
Try that out. Perhaps she just doesn't like the idea of "huge" snakes. Rosy boas and Kenyans are fantastic, indestructable little critters and are VERY low maintenance as far as husbandry goes (even more so than a ball python).
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Author Comment
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10/25/2008 7:27:21 PM
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beradienboadude
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thx alot guys yall really helped i love this site i will talk to my mom about it and thx and well thx i think she will go with it yyyyyyaaaaaallllllllllllllll aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeee aaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Member Comment
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10/25/2008 10:19:13 PM
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Repti_Gal
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if all else fails buy her a bottle of wine then ask :P
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Member Comment
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10/26/2008 1:26:52 AM
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deadvenom
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lol yes wine usually helps..they knwo somethings up..but cant pas it down xD i got my first snake beacuse i was always outside herping and my step dad always wanted one:P
and i got my grandma to call my bci cute and actually KISS her and HOLD her...she was always against kissign animals cuz they are filthy to her...LOL =p
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Member Comment
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10/26/2008 10:28:09 AM
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dalvers63
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I have to chime in on this one. You don't say how old you are, but I want to ask this: When you go off to school, move and get a job, etc...what is going to happen to your snake if you get a boa? You'll find that you would have a hard time renting with reptiles, especially large ones (not impossible, but trust me, it's not easy). You also are not going to be able to take a large boa to school with you as most colleges have size limits or restrictions on pets.
If your mom isn't comfortable with a large snake now it's unlikely that she will want to take care of it when you're no longer at home. No matter how unlikely you think this situation may be, trust me when I say it is more common than you realize. Working with the rescue/Adoption program of our Herp Society, I see it all the time.
I'd wait to get anything large until after you're out on your own and establshed. You're young and have lots of time to get herps.
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Author Comment
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10/27/2008 5:33:32 PM
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beradienboadude
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yeah but my mom wont even let me get a ball python it ssuuuuccckkksss
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Member Comment
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10/28/2008 2:11:36 AM
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amarilrose
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Corn snakes, rosy boas, and the many different species of sand boas are all good candidates in that they are a very manageable size. Aaron actually couldn't have given better advice. Read his response again. For that matter, really read into Deb's (dalvers63) response. What she is talking about CANNOT be overstated!
I am a college student, and a mom. Believe me, while it doesn't seem like it right now, your life WILL CHANGE very significantly, and not in the too-distant future either. I haven't seen you mention your age yet, but when you leave home, whichever way you do it (for most that's college, for some it's the military, and some others may get a job right away, and may even never leave - but that won't be MY kid!!), and whenever that come about, it WILL be a HUGE CHANGE in your life, and there is a very good chance that you will not be able to take any animals with you.
Contrary to popular belief, reptiles live a very, very long time! They also are not disposable. When you leave home, your mom will be stuck caring for your animals until you can get into a situation where you can have them with you again - that's usually a period of YEARS. Lots of kids in your situation who do win their parents over reluctantly and get an animal that their parents don't want to take care of end up having to get rid of their pet when they leave home - this adds a lot of burden onto those rescue organizations that Deb mentioned - and it's an awful thing to do to a pet! Think very carefully about all of these things.
Finally, try just being happy with the one reptile pet you mentioned that you have! Don't spend all of your time despairing over what you don't have - enjoy what you DO have!!
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Author Comment
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10/28/2008 9:48:34 PM
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Member Comment
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10/28/2008 10:51:28 PM
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amarilrose
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Well, you'll be 18 in 7 years then. I can appreciate that that span of time seems like forever to you now, but any snake you might get should be expected to easily live for around 20 years. Many live longer than that. 7 years from now, you probably won't be able to take your pets with you. That means your mom would be stuck caring for it - which isn't good for the snake or your mom if she really doesn't like them - and that's if she doesn't make you find it a new home, which ought to be gut-wrenching at the least. However, somewhere around 9 to 11 years from now, you will probably be able to keep the pets you want. Be patient and use your time now to learn what you can about the species that interest you, so that when you can keep them, you already know something about them.
I had to wait until I was 20 to get my first dog, and realistically, I should have waited longer for my dog's sake, but she is very dear to me and I wouldn't trade her for anything in the world!
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Member Comment
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10/28/2008 11:38:16 PM
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Jeffriey
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All so very true. My female Albino burmese originally belonged to someone who had to give her up when he left for University and no one else wanted to take care of her being such a large snake. Britanny is the only exception that I can think of. Something young people definitely have to seriously think about wanting a large constrictor. Mind you I've seen quite a few smaller reptiles too also being sold for the same reason. Somethng you might want to think about and also honestly talk over with your mom too if she decides to let you get another reptile.
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Member Comment
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11/1/2008 12:54:37 AM
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Joseph Jenkins
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7 yrs is a long time to track down a good care taker for a snake, i say go kid go fight the power!!!!
don't get a rtb
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Member Comment
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10/7/2009 3:57:14 PM
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dalvers63
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4/16/2013 6:42:40 PM
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